Yes, I happen to have an accent

I want three statement T-shirts.

1. "Do I look like a vending machine to you?"
2. "This is my otter shirt"
3. "Yes, I have an accent."

First one is easy to explain.

No matter where I go or what I do it seems that someone always wants something. Whether it is a quarter, dollar or a cigarette, I don't care. It is just so painfully annoying that people want things they can't fucking have. I am not giving them anything.

I was waiting for a bus the other day and a guy WHO LIVES ACROSS THE STREET went through the trouble of crossing the street, came to me and wanted a cigarette. He was on the phone and just yelled at me: "Give me a cigarette!" Rude, huh? I didn't give him one. The expression on his face was worth of that one magical two-letter word. Oh and next to his fucking house is a gas station. Go buy your own cigarettes, dick.

The second T-shirt would just be funny. And cute. Otters are funny and cute, thus the shirt would be funny and cute, too.

Third one is also easy to explain. As a Finnish person studying my degree in the UK, and now doing an study exchange in the United States I hear people commenting on my accent every day. And I fucking hate that, it makes me sick. SICK! Yes, I happen to have an accent - how many languages do you speak? I speak three languages fluently so you go back to your pathetic life and fuck yourself while you're at it.

Sometimes I feel it would be easier just to speak Lolcat.

In general, I just hate everything.